Once the children have mastered all eight of The Crabbies, they are referred to as WiseOnes™. At this point, they are ready to begin learning the U.L.T.I.M.A.T.E. Skills™ and are on their way to becoming U.L.T.I.M.A.T.E. WiseOnes:

Understanding
Listening
Try! Try! Try!
Initiative
Manners
Attitude
Teamwork
Example


UNDERSTANDING
U is for Understanding

"You Know Who, What, Why and When"

Become understanding of yourself and others. This can usually be related to The Crabbies. For example, if a friend gives you a ‘cold pricklie’ (bad attitude, crass response, etc.), instead of being really hurt you might understand that they gave you the ‘cold pricklie’ because they were Too-Tired or maybe not feeling well for some reason. You can still tell them that they hurt your feelings, but you might also HELP THEM understand why they may have given you a ‘cold pricklie’.

(Don’t underestimate children, even little ones. Sometimes kids have an easier time being understanding than we do! Praise them when they are!)

Also, for yourself – be able to recognize when The Crabbies have YOU and you are not using ‘Understanding’ or other ULTIMATE skills. For example, you might notice that you seem to be bothered by almost anything.

Ask yourself…

• “Am I tired?”
• “Am I not feeling well for some reason?”
• “Am I hurrying around like crazy with too much to do?”

Go down the list of Crabbies to identify the underlying reasons for your behavior. (Maybe it isn’t one of “The Eight Most Wanted Crabbies,” but we often find that it is.) Be sure to share your discoveries with any of the children who are around… a great way to teach them how to identify their feelings is by being an example yourself (see ‘Example’ below). Talk about your own feelings openly and how you are able to be more ‘Understanding’.

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LISTENING
L is for Listening

"When asked to do it, you get right to it!"

For group listening we teach three key points:

• Don't talk when someone else is talking.
• Sit up straight. It helps you pay attention.
• Keep your hands to yourself.

For one-on-one listening, we focus on not talking while the other person is talking and looking at the person who is talking to you.

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TRY! TRY! TRY!
T is for Trying

"I think I can. I think I can."

This is an extension of how to deal with Can’t-Do. Trying is about not quitting or giving up! It's about life! Starting to ingrain it early in life is perfect. Encourage even partial effort, and reward it. Then, little by little, encourage greater and greater effort - AND REWARD IT. Over time, they’ll be up to trying many, many things on their own ‘Initiative!’

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INITIATIVE
I is for Initiative

"You weren't asked to do it, but you got right to it!"

'Initiative' is a big word that kids love!
Especially when they use it on their own!
And they will!

Explain that ‘Initiative’ is when they (and you!) do something helpful without being asked. Give them a few examples:

• If they tell you when you are out of paper towels in the bathroom.
• If they pick up litter in the yard.
• If they help someone else clean up.
• If they empty the bathroom wastebasket.

Whenever you catch them at “having initiative”, show some ‘Initiative’ of your own! Jump Up and Down! Reward them with praise and if you’re doing charts, a sticker on that too.

As parents, you’ll be really glad you rewarded this one if it sticks when they are teenagers!

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MANNERS
M is for Manners

"Yes, please."
"No, thank you."

• “Thank you”
• “Excuse me.”
• “May I?”
• Holding or opening the door for someone.
• Offering to help someone carry something.

These, and many, many other words and actions are very easy to teach. They contribute greatly to beating Hurry-Up and Get-Along. And believe us, they go a looooonnnng way with teachers and friends' parents. Remind kids to say, “Thank you,” when someone gives them a ride somewhere, or when leaving a friend’s house after a party or a visit. You get the idea.

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ATTITUDE
A is for Attitude

"Decide to have a good day! If one thing goes wrong, just turn your day around!"

CrabbieMasters and WiseOnes try very hard to have the ‘Attitude’ that you never have to have a bad day - not the whole day for sure. If things start to go wrong, just…

Turn your day around!

When teaching how to, “Turn your day around,” it works the best if you actually, physically, turn around. It also helps if you make a conscious decision yourself to do whatever it takes to make it a good day. Look up, not down, and go find that smiley face on the ceiling!

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TEAMWORK
T is for Teamwork

"When we work together, even BIG JOBS are easy."

It doesn’t take any more than two people to be a team. Plus, it really is fun to work together and get things done! Give “High Fives” and make up little cheers to make this more enjoyable. Encourage team projects where multiple children have input. Include yourself some of the time. Be a good example of a teammate.

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EXAMPLE
E is for Example

"No one is too little or too young to be a good example."

Take time to explain to children what being a good example means. Catch them being a good example and point it out. Also remember, as in the ‘Understanding’ section, that YOU being a good example for a child goes a very long way toward making this teaching stick!

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