Here we are! We are the Crabbies, and we want to ruin your day. Do you know how to chase us away? Before you try, let us introduce ourselves.
I’m the King. I’m IN CHARGE of all the Crabbies. My mission is to send in the Crabbies – the more the merrier – to ruin your day. The best days for me are when you don’t get enough sleep and you are too tired to even think; I can send in most of my Crabbies on those days. If kids start to get wild and the adults are pulling out their hair, you know I’m there! By the way, the CrabbieMasters will try to tell you they are in charge of me. Don’t listen to any of that goody-goody talk. CrabbieMasters SchmabbieMasters. I’m the King and that’s it!
I’m Too-Tired. I’m the first Crabbie and I’m the worst Crabbie! I like when you don’t get enough sleep. I like when you mess around at bedtime, and when you think you’re too big to take a nap during the day. The CrabbieMasters call me “The Worst Crabbie in the Universe.” I’m good with that! They know when I get to them they may as well give up because they’re too tired to beat any of the other Crabbies. When you’re too tired, you don’t even want to have FUN. I can tell you what I don’t like - I don’t like the CrabbieMasters going around telling you a nap is a Power-Up. They say, “Power-Up for energy to have more fun!” That makes me sick. And tired!
I’m Hungry! I’m the sneaky one. I love when adults are too busy to plan ahead for meals. And I really love when kids say they’re not hungry because they don’t want to quit doing whatever they’re doing. WHAM! That’s when I sneak in. You lose your energy and seem tired, then suddenly you don’t even want to play. You may also become whiney about any little thing. My personal favorite is when you freak out and have a major meltdown. It doesn’t matter where you are - you can have a meltdown anywhere, right on the spot!
I’m Junk-Food. I love when you fill your belly with junk food like chips, ice cream, cookies, candy, cake, and soda. I want you to eat junk food - not vegetables, or fruits, or anything else those CrabbieMasters refer to as "good foods,” or worse yet, “grow foods.” They try telling you junk food doesn’t give you energy... HA! I see you eat junk food and have lots of energy. They say it isn’t good energy because it doesn’ last, but it lasts long enough for me. Long enough for me to see you running around, all wound up, and then WHAM! BAM! CRASH! It’s what I live for.
I am Achy. Germs, germs, germs - I love germs! So be sure you don’ wash your hands, or worse yet, cover your mouth when you cough or sneeze. I really love kids who put dirty things in their mouths. Too-Tired and Junk-Food are like my BFF’s. We all love, love, love the couch potatoes who don’t exercise, stay up late, and sit around eating junk food. Don’t listen to the CrabbieMasters when they give you tips on how to keep me away. Being sick is a fact of life and there’s absolutely nothing you can do to change that.
I’m Can’t-Do, and I love hearing you say, “I can’t do it” or “I’m too scared!” I love when you do not even try. Don’t listen to those CrabbieMasters. They’ll tell you to say, “I think I can,” and, “Try, try, try.” They’ll be all encouraging and tell you not to give up. YUCK! You cannot do it. End of story!
I am Get-Along. I am the Crabbie who steps in and keeps people from getting along with each other. It can cause trouble with kids or adults.; makes no difference to me! It’s simple. I love it when things go wrong and people are upset with each other. I do not... I repeat, I do not like CrabbieMasters who get in my business. They’re always talking about their number one rule: Be nice. Makes me sick. They’re getting in my way. I used to hear, “I’m telling on you! I’m telling mom!” Now, thanks to the goody goody CrabbieMasters, I hear, “Let’s work it out.” I hear crazy talk like that and I go find someone else to bug.
I’m Hurry-Up. Real quick, here’s what I like: adults who are always in a hurry and kids who are never in a hurry. This combo is what I live for. My best bud, Get-Along, and I dance and sing when we watch kids and their parents go round-and-round trying to get out the door! What I don’t like is when I hear this corny little chant: adults say, “When asked to do it,” and then CrabbieMasters kids say, “We get right to it!” When I hear that, I plug my ears and skate away as fast as I can.
We are so pleased to meet you and happy that you stopped by to learn more about us. Here are a few pictures of us from a recent photo shoot:
Our group photo!
Hurry-Up doesn’t like getting his picture taken
Our group meeting with the King!